breaking fingernails

i'm looking at you
a glimpse for a second
how i wish i could stick you to my mirror
and stare at you on a daily routine
to find any kind of flaw in you
that i can't locate now
but you're not even giving a glance 
because you're not thinking about me
the way i am
or are you?

i wish you could notice the way i 
strangle myself just for you to 
hear me breathing
breathing your voice and
canyouhearyournameinmylaughter?
doing whatever i can
to remind myself of you
just in case you're not remembering me

i'm looking at your fingertips
just inches from mine as you speak
yearning to touch you and 
wondering if you're feeling the same way, too
because i doubt my every second that you are

i'm not the one you picture often, i don't think,
but trust me when i say i see you even after
i blind myself a million times by
staring at the sun to erase your image from my memory

and it just increases on the hurt
when i ask myself why i did that for
because i wish you'd notice my lips bitten
through every minute i restrain

i'm looking at the way your mouth
forms a smile
and i can't help but to find myself smiling, too
because you're everything worth being happy for