subconsciousbreaths

you fit me into every category synonymous to

perfection

though i sometimes don't feel that way like

the way i sometimes feel you deserve more the way you look at me differently 

to how i scoff at myself the way i have done things that makes me sick and 

makes you fake a smile but i know you 

hurt.

i don't want to believe in sunsets anymore

because they just loom over you until

you are gulped down by the dark and

dragged through shards of

solitary thoughts

i don't know why i do this to myself

but you tell me not to because

i am everything you want

you force me not to worry 

for you have promised me the strings of

your pulpating heart which you

slipped upon my palm when i was

never watching

the way you whisper in my ear and i forget tomorrows the way you shower me 

with kisses that hold many forevers the way you shudder me with a trace of 

your fingertip on my hip

but i fret not over reasons you see

but the fretting merely 

emerges when i 

figure out moments when you

look at me like i am

Venus

when i feel as ugly as

the gargoyles of Notredame.