my terrorist

i feel a hundred and one degrees 

searing through the capillaries within my body

and it is the proof that i am once again

locking myself behind cages and

wearing beautiful masks 

i become something i am not

i wonder how he is capable of

noticing it when i 

slip away from him

the moments when my fingers

trickle out of his and he seems to hold on

and squeeze

a little tighter to reassure me 

i don't have to be alone in this

but i am not

for there are always those haunting thoughts

screaming and mocking

i am turning into those people

everyone hates and

jeers at for having no life

for i have no life in me

i agree

so why do i still feel like i am about to 

explode?

but i will not be as pretty a sight as

fireworks in the sky but more of a plane

crashing through buildings and

killing lives.