listen

you know you have

turned inside out when

you start to listen to silence

as a favourite routine, a daily tune

and you hate those voices of comfort.

leave me.

leave me alone.

sometimes if you listen hard enough

you might just hear another

star explode

and fall

this is how we get fallen stars beside us

and blackholes in the sky.

there are certain sounds that

scare me

like the creak of a door

or the distant horn of a truck

and memories

memories of his heart beating

like a lullaby beside me.

so i reside myself to

loud crashed of thunder and constant

whirrings of a fan

just so i might be able

to wrench all those memories

away from my

mind

because i am sick of my screams

when i awake from

a favourite nightmare.