alone with the evening

i counted the many breaths it takes
before a confession
and the heat that burns
the tip of your thoughts
with every attempt
to numb dissatisfaction.

i slide through every fall
of the sun seeping towards the horizon
stealing the sleep i am deprived of
and consider the impact of
every storey
is it worse with emotions
or without?

i force forward aimlessly
filling gaps that never fill
and count the breaths it takes
to feel alive.

shivering.
solitary.
still counting.

the many breaths it takes
before your heart
stops trying
and gives way to illusion.