tearing the nightsky down

she used to stand beneath gray skies

with glitter in her eyes and stars in her smile,

a round locket of happiness tight

to her chest, where no one could touch

which no one could falter,

she was the glow in the dark,

an everlasting surge of

pure joy.

there were miniscule things, yes,

that would loosen her smile, but never did she

lose her appetite for laughter

and laughter was forever in reach,

until he came plunging through her heart

with a chainsaw of rage and his

inhuman darkness broke her into

pieces of

self destruction and distrust.

there were many things that led her to

a depression that tasted like knives and

ripped like dark red wounds

but only one tipped her

too far. Until now,

she cannot recall reasons to why

she had woken up one day

with scars on her arms and the taste

of nothing

at the back of her throat.

precise images of him playing about

in the hemorrhages of her mind.

it was a desperate attempt, there after,

of searching for laughter and forcing glitter

into her eyes until she went blind

to reality,

and all the while he loomed above,

chainsaw in hand, ready

to ruin every hole in her heart

he pretentiously tried to show

he could heal.

and then he was gone.

but she was here, still,

searching, ploughing through memories

of a long gone euphoria,

when she used to wake up to a small piece of heaven.

and she is still here,

no more glitters in her eyes

newfound chills in her smile,

trying to find perfect excuses to fit

a shattered locket of what was once -

to reason out why she is now this way.

everythingbuthimeverythingbuthim

because he is the one memory

she wants to forget, but the one memory

unforgettable,

and she denies, how one memory is sometimes

all you need, enough to burn

brighter than the sun

and make her as gray as the skies

that once bowed to her shine.